What a Gay Wants

SEXUAL RACISIM

I was recently reading an article in an Australian gay weekly that discussed the idea of sexual racism. The gist of the article dealt with how minorities within the gay community are often slighted. And while I have no dispute with that element, one other part of the article caught my attention. There was a group that was protesting things like “No-GAM” (Gay Asian Males) notices on dating sites.

Now, back in the day when I was a wild single man, I used a variety of websites myself. And while I never went so far as to state on my profile that I wasn’t into any particular racial group, I also can’t deny that there are certain races (hmmmmm, Italians….) that I can barely resist and others that I don’t find sexually attractive. And one great thing about being a single gay man is that if you are looking for sex (and sex alone) other men don’t really have a problem with this. So I don’t really see what is wrong in spelling this out in the sexual arena. Perhaps this is in the naivety of a white guy, but if you not attracted to someone because they are short, blond, have hairy chest or not, have big feet, have a huge cock, like to dress preppy or happen to be a certain race, all of these things are the same. This is just a question of attraction.

To me, this is different from saying that you don’t want anything to do with someone because they are Asian for example. This is saying you are not sexually attracted to someone for that reason. I’ve been turned down because someone was into Asians and I didn’t think he was a racist for it. Just honest about what he was looking for physically in a person.

But then I got to thinking about whether this sexual attraction would preclude me from having a relationship with someone due to their race. And I have to admit that it probably would. I need to be sexually attracted to whomever I am with. Does this make me racist? I don’t think so. Just shallow. Very very shallow.